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The Beasts of Cedar Valley

07/21/05

Permalink 08:32:54 pm, by Melba
Categories: Commentary

The Beasts of Cedar Valley

In Jamaica we have a saying, 'believe kills and believe cures', but is this the case with the Beast of Cedar Valley, St. Ann. Several eye wittnesses claim to have seen the strange creatures.
Reports are that there are two of them, one brown and white and the other black. According to The Star one eye wittness says 'They look like dawg, bark like dawg but the funniest ting it don't carry feet like dawg. Dem carry hoof like goat.'
They feed on trees and have so far devoured more than ten banana trees and one cedar tree. The Beasts have only been seen at night between midnight and dawn and appear every two or three weeks for the past three months.
Some believe it's a 'rolling calf', some believe its a fulfilment of prophecy or an indication that the world is coming to an end.
Any where else in the world and we would say the Beast must be the result of an experiment gone terrible wrong. What do you think?
Walk good.
Nuff love

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Sister Mary Margaret

SISTER MARGARET MARY, WHO WORKS FOR A LOCAL HOME HEALTH AGENCY WAS OUT MAKING HER ROUNDS WHEN SHE RAN OUT OF GAS.

AS LUCK WOULD HAVE IT A GAS STATION WAS JUST A BLOCK AWAY.

SHE WALKED TO THE STATION TO BORROW A CAN OF GAS TO START & THEN DRIVE TO THE STATION FOR A FILL UP.

THE ATTENDANT REGRETFULLY TOLD HER THE ONLY GAS CAN HE OWNED HAD BEEN LOANED OUT BUT IF SHE WOULD WAIT, IT WAS SURE TO BE BACK SHORTLY.

SINCE THE NUN ! WAS ON THE WAY TO SEE A PATIENT SHE DECIDED NOT TO WAIT & SHE WALKED BACK TO THE CAR. AFTER LOOKING FOR SOMETHING TO FILL WITH GAS, SHE SPOTTED A BEDPAN SHE WAS TAKING TO THE PATIENT.

ALWAYS RESOURCEFUL, SHE CARRIED IT TO THE STATION & FILLED IT WITH GASOLINE, & CARRIED IT TO HER CAR.

AS SHE WAS POURING THE GAS INTO THE TANK, TWO MEN WERE WATCHING FROM ACROSS THE STREET. ONE OF THEM TURNED TO THE OTHER & SAID, "IF IT STARTS, I'M TURNING CATHOLIC".

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